@Veins Of Scarlet: All i want is you to listen .

I'm fat and ugly. I'm made of flaws. I yearn to be happy.

My name is Melissa Wong; the broken one .

My life is covered with unhealed bruises & scars . God is my first priority & only God can judge me , so who the hell are you ? Im fat & ugly . Im made of flaws . I yearn to be happy . Im always tired , but it is the kind of tired that even sleeping cant fix . Im going through constant excruciating pain . Pain so bad I'd take take death with a smile just to get away from it . & you'll never know what its like to beg God everyday to just take all the agony away with crippled anger & tears that still drip sore . I love songs which can relate to my feelings . I desire no wealth or health , i just want to be happy . I dont like liars , betrayers nor kpos , I DETEST COPYCATS . I can cry for 4hours straight or laugh for the rest of my life , you decide . It takes years to build up trust with me but seconds to destroy it . Im very soft hearted , but dont take me for granted . Im not helpless . Maybe discouraged & faltering , but not helpless . I love to pray , as GOD listens to me . People said i changed so much . Well , here is the truth . I grew up . I stopped letting ppl push me around all the time , I learnt that i cant always be happy . I , accepted reality .

For all sad words of tongue & pen , the saddest are this " It might have been " .

Friday, September 24, 2010

All i want is you to listen .

Im sorry , asshole .

When i ask you to listen to me & you start giving me advice , you have not done what i asked . Listen ! All i ask is that you listen . Dont talk or do - just hear me . Advice is cheap; 20cents will get you guys in the same newspaper . When you do something for me that i can & need to do for myself , you contribute to my fear & inadequacy . But when you accept as a simple act that what i feel is what i feel , no matter how irrational , then i can stop trying to convince you & get the business of understanding whats behind this irrational feeling . & when that is clear , the answers are obvious & i dont need any advice . Irrational feelings make sense when we understand what's behind them . Perhaps that's why prayers work for me , becos God is mute & he doesn't give advice or try to fix things . So pls listen , & hear me out . & if you diedie must talk , wait a minute for your turn - i will listen to you .