Do you know what it's like to go to bed each night feeling like you haven accomplished anything ? My hypocritical view on time leaves me at a loss . There aren't enough hours in a day . I need more time to do all that i want to do . At the same time ,rhey is way too much . The day crawla along leaving me too many seconds to think about my hatred of everything , most often , myself . There's too much yet too little . I guess it's just another contradiction that defines my life .
I should stop telling ppl that im fine , becos im not fine . I havent been fine since i were a kid; I havent been fine since I started piecing my life together .Its all quite a mess , isn't it . Everyone seems to have lost sight of their own humanity . I havent been fine since that day i felt so depressed & lonely . I rmb that day . I swang myself onto my bed & cried everynight consecutively for 2weeks . It seems like I was crying for the world & the lost of my obliviousness . I will work for the rest of my life , trying to be honest when i say " Im fine ".
Somtimes , I just feel like ripping my body apart & let the sun shine in .
