Becos it is never appreciated . Becos whatever i do is never good enough . Becos im the second one , i have to take all the responsibilities . Becos i dont have attitude & character like hers , so you take me for granted . When i do something wrong , you will never let me forget . But when i do something right , you will never ever remember . You think you are doing a good job ? You always blame me when the computer is down , there has never been once when you blamed yourself . You downloaded so many crap into the shitty computer & yet you have never thought that maybe they are crashing the computer , so smart . You always say that i dont tell you stuff , you always say that im hiding things from you & you always say that im closer to my friends than to you . You know why ? Becos you know no fucking shit of what is happening & has happened to me . ALL YOU EVER THINK ABOUT IS MY STUDIES & ALL YOU EVER TALK ABOUT IS STUDIES . You think that Im happy & I have everything right . Well you are wrong . I have been through so much more than you will ever imagine & sadly , you know nothing . Yes , im the one who didn't tell you anything , well that's becos im not convinced why i should . & whenever i try to talk to you , you are always shutting me up . & you will never try to stand in my shoes . This is why i dont ever talk about my problems to you . Im not a good girl ? Yeah . Im not . You are very disappointed in me ? I would say the feeling is mutual . I didn't say sorry becos i am in the wrong . I say sorry becos i treasure this kinship more than my ego . I rather feel wrongly accused than to have cold war with you . I tried to talk to you & i tried to do something for you . But you are so unappreciative , so be it . Just so you know , i tried . If this is how you want it to be , it is fine with me . This home is supposed to make me feel better & more relax but when i return home from school , all i hear is quarrelling & arguments . I FUCKING HATE IT . This home is giving me more stress than i have outside . I feel like i can't even breathe . Gawd ! That's why i hate going home !
Sometimes you make me miss daddy so much . Sometimes you make me really wonder what is it like to have another parent to depend & cry on & what is the feeling like of being able to run to daddy when mummy is angry . Sometimes you really really make me so so so sad . & what hurts the most is , you have no idea .
