@Veins Of Scarlet: The excruciating pain .

I'm fat and ugly. I'm made of flaws. I yearn to be happy.

My name is Melissa Wong; the broken one .

My life is covered with unhealed bruises & scars . God is my first priority & only God can judge me , so who the hell are you ? Im fat & ugly . Im made of flaws . I yearn to be happy . Im always tired , but it is the kind of tired that even sleeping cant fix . Im going through constant excruciating pain . Pain so bad I'd take take death with a smile just to get away from it . & you'll never know what its like to beg God everyday to just take all the agony away with crippled anger & tears that still drip sore . I love songs which can relate to my feelings . I desire no wealth or health , i just want to be happy . I dont like liars , betrayers nor kpos , I DETEST COPYCATS . I can cry for 4hours straight or laugh for the rest of my life , you decide . It takes years to build up trust with me but seconds to destroy it . Im very soft hearted , but dont take me for granted . Im not helpless . Maybe discouraged & faltering , but not helpless . I love to pray , as GOD listens to me . People said i changed so much . Well , here is the truth . I grew up . I stopped letting ppl push me around all the time , I learnt that i cant always be happy . I , accepted reality .

For all sad words of tongue & pen , the saddest are this " It might have been " .

Monday, November 22, 2010

The excruciating pain .

HEY ! Today i went for my first C.i.P . With DES , Dhiri , Narinpal , Sam . The kids are damn adorable . First brought them bukitbatok CC to have their rehearsal , spent like quite afew hours there . Helped them changed , go toilet & bring them back . HAHA . After the break , Narinpal , DES & I were all v.busy wrapping presents . Apparantly , Narinpal fails his mathe , keep counting wrongly ! But its really fun though ! :) After that played with the kids & i found one cute little guy who looked just like a duck , he shall be my favourite from now on . Going thr again on wednesday & thursday ~

Have you spared a thought for me ? Do you know how helpless i felt ? Do you know how sad i was when you gave me a cold shoulder ? I've had enough . 1 chance after another . Im choking boy , i cant breathe anym . I tried to be thr for you , but you pushed me away , i feel lika fool . You're suppose to be here for me , be the tissue when i cry , the shoulder for me to lean on , the hand which will guide me through my pass . I lost trust , faith & hope in you . Again & again you make me shed tears for you . How did you bring yourself to hurt me like this ?.